beneath those shadows...

Saturday, January 27, 2007

My dear little ones.. I'm fine.
though it hard to forget everything but I'll try my very best.
don't worry Perry, I'm a strong girl.
I will be able to walk out of this period.
what every happened during o levels, during and after prom which eventually drag till my china trip is however still living vividly in my heart.
perhaps forgetting it is too hard.
probably keep it as a memory rather than a nightmare or lesson learnt can be of less painful.
my foolish act to step into that place even after many people discouraging.
when love is foolish and stubborn itself.
many tell me to stop being foolish and move on as I deserve better.
but the point is not about comparing partners or what he deserves you or not.
the matter lies with the fact that feelings cannot be easily forgotten or cultured within a short period.
liling, as I have told you on Monday.
I will no longer stop you for doing anything foolish because I am too.
however I still know whets rational.
I will no longer support your decision towards that particular matter.
you and I both know really well about the outcome.
but your stubbornness insisted that you gave it a last try.
however ling, you need to have a strong and firm stand
please do not be easily swayed and influenced
both Perry and I are really worried about you GRADUALLY getting hurt.
when I shan't make things sound so obvious.
if you are reading this article, please for god's sake love ling wholeheartedly.
stop hurting her, the amount of hurt you gave ling is comparable to the amount of love ling showered upon you.
well you can hate me for all you want for blogging such a post but you can never stop ling from loving you.
no one has the rights to inflict pain onto one another but in life we always cross that boundary.

crystal [searchin] 6:20 AM

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Apparently it has been decades since I blog.
Once again i will start the entry with sentences like so many events have occurred and I have absolute no idea of how to present them.
Well. simple as that life is never fair.
Sometimes you will get to be really lucky while others tend to be really unfortunate.
Perhaps i am really unfortunate.
After that significant event in July, he came back asking how I was on Thursday, 18 of January 2007.
He asked if I still fancy him even though he has been attached.
Explanation to this was that he wanted to clear things up.
I mean whats the point?
You mean you still want me to be your friend after toying with me?
You actually thought that I really didnt hate you?
Although I told you I never hated you a single bit but I very much hated you.
You could never imagine the life that I had when you had another girl in your arms.
You could never imagine me crying and you laughing with her.
You brought all this to me and I stupidly believed all your lies.
Well. I couldn’t say its entirely your fault because you came with the lamest and lousiest reasons saying that you left because you felt that it was the wrong time to approach me and probably I am not the girl for you.
Wow.seriously you make yourself sound so low.
U actually have to use such excuses to make yourself sound so good or rather less gulity.
you tried to be a gentleman by telling me that he still loves me a lot.
Wow!!!!!!!!!!!
You said that he was your good friend.
Can u imagine me telling him what you actually have done?
Can you still face him?
You when after his ex and toyed with her feeling and then tried to bring them back together?
Seriously your actions cant deny the fact that youre a loser.
You snatched someone else’s girlfriend to be yours.
Apparently the only conclusion I ever get from you is that U LOVE STUFF THAT OTHERS OWN.
U don’t have a life…
You live in the shadows of others.
U believe that the happiness shared between the others can be snatched and taken away by you.
Well I just want to you, I pity you.
You will never gain my respect or trust because you have betrayed them.

crystal [searchin] 3:01 AM